Having a Chinese husband 有中国的老公

This is apparently my “claim to fame” – I married a Chinese man. 

I get identified more as “the foreign girl with a Chinese husband” than I do by my own name.  During the 2008 Beijing Olympics, I was a volunteer interpreter and reporters asked more questions about my marriage than they did about my volunteer work.  People I have never seen or met before often know I have a Chinese husband before I even get the chance to introduce myself.  So this is my identity, 洋媳妇 or 山东媳妇.

I don’t mind it that much.  I’d like to think that there is more about me than just being foreign and married to a local, but it is what stands out at first glance.  I understand that people are curious as to why any western girl would come to China and marry a poor farm boy.  I just tell people that it was destiny.  You can’t choose who you love.  

There are many struggles with being married to a man with a background so completely different than mine, but there is never a dull moment.

我的名誉索赔就是这样 – 我跟一个中国男人的结婚。

我的洋媳妇的身份比自己的名字更有知名度。2008的北京奥运会,我在青岛的奥帆基地当志愿者,当时记者问我的关于婚姻的问题比志愿者的问题多的多。我在自我介绍前大多陌生人却早已知道我有个中国老公。的确如此,我的身份就是山东的洋媳妇。
不过我也没什么介意。我能了解人们为什么好奇一个西方女孩愿意跟一个普通的中国男人结婚。我只能说是缘分,缘分到了,谁也没法控制爱情。
跟一个和我背景如此截然不同的人结婚有很多难处却不会无聊。

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6 Comments

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6 responses to “Having a Chinese husband 有中国的老公

  1. Hi Ericka, it’s great to see you have a blog now, and are sharing your voice with the world. Until more of us speak out, we’ll always be a curiosity, so I’m glad you are.

  2. thelocaldialect

    Hi! I found you via Jocelyn, who seems to have all the scoop on all of us 洋媳妇 around the globe … it is always nice to meet another Chinese/foreign couple, and extra nice to meet another rare breed type like us, where the woman is actually the foreigner.

    Anyhow, I’m Jessica from The Local Dialect, my husband is from Yunnan and we’re living in Beijing now. I get you on the curiosity aspect of the relationship — To China at large I’m always the foreigner who rather bafflingly picked a Chinese guy and my husband is this awesomely 厉害 guy who managed to reel me in. At least it does seem like you see more foreign wives around these days than you did even 5 years ago, so perhaps one day we’ll be as commonplace as the foreign husbands.

    Hope you stick with the blog, I’ll be back again I’m sure.

  3. wocview

    A simple but touching story! You have earned yourself a fan from a very tiny country in Europe! I wish there were more western girls/woman who could lower their prejudice and take a chance at something great.

    Sometimes you will find similar stories on the blog me and my buddies have. Check it out 🙂

  4. “I understand that people are curious as to why any western girl would come to China and marry a poor farm boy. I just tell people that it was destiny. You can’t choose who you love.

    There are many struggles with being married to a man with a background so completely different than mine, but there is never a dull moment.”

    So beautifully said!! I couldn’t have said it better myself!

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